Paradise

(Jeanne’s beach)

Isn’t it interesting how some people come in to our lives?

While we lived in California I met all my wife’s siblings as they would come to visit their mother. All except one. I had heard about Jeanne and knew she was into gymnastics, had 3 children and was divorced but I never saw her.

We moved to Illinois in 1989 and a couple years later my mother-in-law, along with her husband, followed. Jeanne and one of her sisters were doing a “Thelma and Louise” type road trip across country. They stopped by for a visit. One of the first things Jeanne did was sit on my lap and give me a smooch on the cheek. I didn’t know what to do.

She was a force to be reckoned with.

After her divorce she made a bold move and took her 3 kids to Hawaii.  But not the part you always see on TV.  A little island called Lanai would be their home.  She opened a gymnastics center and taught classes.  She fell in love with the place.

When her kids were older they moved back to California to be near their Dad.  But she had made a connection to the island and decided to go back and become an elementary school teacher there.  At age 52 she started teaching 2nd graders.  She got her Masters in education and continued to teach for 12 years.

We never saw Jeanne again till about 5 years ago when she started dating a pilot out of Detroit.  So she would stop in on a regular basis.  She loved our kids who would always greet her with hugs.  A couple years ago she wanted to bring her 3 to meet us.  Laurie and I were into dancing then so we decided to go out.  The only place we could find open on this off night was a gay bar.  So we went.  That was one for the books.

But you couldn’t tell by the look on her face.  She took everything in stride.  She was a free spirit.  And she was just ornery enough.  Not too much.  Just enough.  We made a connection.

A couple years ago she came back for our daughter’s wedding and stayed the whole week with us.  She bought dinners.  Took our kids to the beach.  Helped around the house.  It was great.  She was part of the family.

In February my wife and I took a long awaited trip to Hawaii for our 30th anniversary.  We let her know we were coming and made arrangements to see her on the weekend.  We’d never been and were so excited.  We bought our plane tickets and made all our reservations and plans.  Then Jeanne texted us.  She wanted to help pay for our flight.  It was totally unexpected but fantastic that she would be this generous.   But that’s how she was.

She gave us a tour of the island.  I remember standing on a dock where the barge comes in to deliver all the supplies for the island.  She told us about setting up a trampoline on the dock so she and her kids could do flips into the water.  On the other side she showed where she went scuba diving.  It was so deep, dark and scary.  I asked if she was worried about sharks down there and she said they leave you alone as long as you don’t bother them.  She said it like she was talking about a honey bee.

She was always fit and used to run the hills on the island in addition to swimming, snorkeling and gymnastics.  She even did the Hawaii Ironman at the age of SIXTY.

Everyone on the island knew her.  And with a population around 3000 it was doable.  From the waitress at the resort to the guy walking down the street.  “Hi Miss Mitchell!”  She taught all their kids.

When it was the end of the day in her house she would wrap up in a blanket because she was soooo cold.  (Anything below 65 is cold to islanders)  But she also said she felt tired and was beginning to be sore a lot.  She was 64 so I just chalked it up to old age.

It wasn’t.

We learned in late May she has Stage 4 lung cancer that had metastasized into her bones.  Efforts were made to get her to California to be with her kids.  But it was too late and she was too sick to travel.  Laurie wanted to leave right away to be with her but we held out hope for better news.  There wasn’t.  Laurie, her baby sister, was on the next plane and is there now.

Her kids just landed and they will have a reunion in Paradise.  Not heaven.  Paradise.  That’s what she called Hawaii.  HER paradise.  Jeanne’s mother, Pauline, introduced her to the islands as a young woman and they’ve called to her ever since.

I never knew Jeanne as a younger woman.  I didn’t need to.  I already know she possessed those rare traits that many of us long for.  Brave and bold.  Taking on life on her terms.  There wasn’t anything she wouldn’t do if she had the mind to.  A goofball, prankster, proud mother, sister and friend.  And best of all, generous and kind.

I keep saying “was” because at any moment now her Spirit will soar above the island she’s called home for so long.  She will travel to a new Paradise.  And see what it has to offer.

Then, with a new set of lungs, probably go for a run.